Night Shift SOP

晚班所扮演的角色. 是垃圾桶.



晚班如果上久了, 皮球也會接的越來越多, 越來越奇特.

慢慢的了解到, 不管是哪個種族, 原來人性, 都是懶惰的.



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e.g.



The great Americans: ...I am doing the best I can, and followed all the instructions on the trace

...what?! there is still a 2nd page on the trace?! un... I'll see about that...



* (Please imagine the sound of gun fire, explosion, and people crying for medic as the background music)



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The romantic European: ...oui,oui,si,si...I understand...but we are in holiday today you know??

no people will deliver no thing you know??



* (Sitting on their patio furniture in nude, sipping their AOC wine, and listen to Enya.)



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The kamikazes: ...ya,ya,hai,hai...maybe...impossible...ya,ya,hai,hai...



*(People are warming Sake, put their tie on their head, chopsticks in their hands and ready to rock'n'roll!!)



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此後為了避免任何包裹Delay的問題, 以及維護"屎命必達"宗旨, 我等晚班弟兄將實施終極對應方案,



方案如下:



Alan: 負責對應 SFS/CDG/WOC等窗口.

Bryant: 負責呆灣Local的調派及聯絡.

Daniel:負責對應 ANC的窗口.

客服:給他放著爛.



流程:



起至1500開始開車收貨,送貨. 為避免浪費客戶寶貴的時間, 任何SCQ/IRQ 相關之Q一概不予ASSIGN/, C/B.

包裹收了就閃, 丟了就跑.



時間就是$, 原車不上SHUTTLE 直殺 WOTA. 出口由Bryant色誘海關, 一率C1放行. 報單等不必要文件一律假造.

Bryant 穿好褲子之後, 聯絡好呆灣調派之事宜, 關好燈鎖好門直接從HQ到WOTA報到, 處理飛航調派相關事宜.



加好油飛機直飛各個O/B目的地, 沿途只收呆灣I/B之貨件以至達成原機來回以減少轉運時間, 其他國家之飛機

航班表一概不予理會, 充分表現我等自私自利,不管別人生死的決心.



為爭取時間及解決時差問題, 所有trace駕駛艙內連線解決. 同上, 所有SCQ/CPW/POD之 相關trace一概置之不理,





飛機抵達後再由Bryant色誘進口海關, 全部不拆箱不驗文件, 一律0 %進口稅, 客戶滿意度100%.(海關也100%)

Bryant 穿好褲子之後直奔HQ與正規Disp交接, 本人與Alan 將貨件交至Ramp弟兄後, 2 話不說, 就地解散.



此辦法即刻生效, 執行人員對於相關法令後果概不負責.





Yeah!!! We Live To Deliver, Baby!!!



p.s: 如果公司追究責任的話, 我是MAZE...